Lessons learned in Life

About a year ago I got a job at a Firestone, rotating tires, changing oil, and all that other good stuff. It was too late to find a job elsewhere since summer had already started, and I needed money really bad. So the first day I showed up at work and they asked me to go to the back of the shop and change. Needless to say I was the youngest and had the smallest waist size - most of them had me beat by a good 6 sizes. They weren't going to give me new clothes because I was only going to work the summer. So I got a blue work shirt that said Joe on the left chest and had a big grease mark right across the fourth button on both halves of the shirt. There were five people that worked regularly and two that came in three days a week (and by week I mean 7 days a week, not your 5 day business week). Because I was new and an apprentice they had me close shop everyday - which means a 10 hour shift with a 30 min lunch break. I learnt many things during the three weeks that I worked there but there are two things I learnt which I will never forget.
1) On my first day at work, my supervisor Steve opened up the hood of a Dodge Caravan to explain my responsibilities under the hood and show me where to look for what. He asked me to pop the hood from the driver's seat and then come out and open it up by myself. So I popped the hood, and came out to open the hood. I was stumbling around for about 10 secs because the only hood I had opened before was my Honda's and I had no experience whatsoever. So Steve looks at me and says, "Do you like girls?... I mean you aren't gay or anything are you?" I looked at Steve in total consternation and said, "No no, I'm quite straight." And Steve continued, "Well, then think of the car like your gf, feel around and take your time to find the hook and then push it aside slowly. Do it like you were undoing her bra." Having heard this quite hilarious analogy, I started laughing really bad and so did he. Steve must've used this on many apprentices before but it is one of those things that never loses its humor. And sure enough, within no time I had undone her bra.

2) The second lesson I learnt, was that fixing cars for 10 hours straight while not sitting down even once, will make you a stronger man in your calves. I quit after three weeks because my calves were as strong as they will ever be. Within those three weeks I unhooked 250 bras...